“I am really glad that Apple finally responded to my many complaints about the lack of a left-leaning pen. There is so much discrimination against lefties these days, and it helps to have that sort of representation in emojis.” “I am very excited about the new update! Now I can finally show my respect […]
New Emojis? Slew of Opi(nion)s! Read More »
INT. MANSION IN ROME—NIGHT JAMES BOND (poised, icy) steps softly towards WIDOW (beautiful, haughty), who stands against the opposite wall. As he approaches, she whips open a black lace fan and holds it over her face. BOND is, as usual, completely unfazed.
Alternate dialogue to Spectre scene leaked to Stranded! Read More »
Okay, so congrats or whatever. The Blue Jays had the third best record in the MLB and have come back from a 2-0 deficit to win their American League Division Series over the Texas Rangers. And it was in particularly fantastic fashion, given José Bautista’s seventh inning home run. Don’t let it be said I
Calm Down, Toronto: A Non-Torontonian’s Perspective Read More »
Every day, hundreds of heterosexual men in your community are afflicted by a condition called The Waist-Touch Disorder, or W-TD (known in the medical world as Unnecessitus Gropiosis). This grievous condition, aggravated by the close proximity of a woman, causes the man’s auditory and verbal abilities to become directly linked to the mobility of his
How Much Do YOU Know About The WAIST-TOUCH DISORDER (W-TD)? Read More »
“In one of my pockets is a sweet, sweet candy bar. In the other, an even sweeter candy bar that contains razor wire. Oh, I forgot to mention that the first candy bar is poisoned. That part is kind of important. Anyway, pick one.” “On July 29, 1981, I recorded the television broadcast of Prince
Humans of Victoria College Read More »
The University of Toronto Students’ Union was the subject of more controversy than usual this past week with its filing of a lawsuit against former executive figures. Charges of civil fraud against the UTSU’s former executive director, president, and vice-president internal and services were reported by The Varsity on September 24. The UTSU allege a loss
Explaining The UTSU’s 1,975 Overtime Hours Problem Read More »
Amid much fanfare, Pope Francis successfully concluded his first visit to the United States of America last week. The trip was highlighted by an address to both Congress and the UN General Assembly, a visit to a correctional facility, and a Papal motorcade through Central Park. Everyday Americans, the press, and politicians offered praise to
Pope Francis’ Popemobile To Headline Reboot of ‘Pimp My Ride’ Read More »
One of the more controversial premieres at the Toronto International Film Festival is the historical drama Stonewall, directed by Roland Emmerich. Based on the Stonewall Riots of 1969 that were foundational to the LGBT civil rights movement, the film has come under fire for not casting any trans actors or actresses as major trans characters,
Grading The Historical Accuracy Of Roland Emmerich’s Films Read More »
Experts have been studying a young woman who was the victim of “Violent Bonding” during Victoria College’s Frosh Week 2012. During a game of Ninja, the student, who The Strand has decided should probably remain anonymous, was struck in the face by a fellow Vic student during his turn. Although early examination showed no signs
Second-year student James Culus announced this morning that he finally built up the confidence to birth/unleash a baby turdzilla in the co-ed bathrooms of his Margaret Addison Hall residence. “I told my roommate I was going to brush my teeth,” Culus told reporters at a press conference on Thursday.
First-Time Marg Ad Student Finally Goes Number Two Read More »
