Three new ways to make love

Boiled Hot Dogs

Step one: Place a hot water bottle on your pussy (or bussy) until it reaches an internal temperature of 40° Celsius. 

Step two: While your pussy (or bussy) is warming, use oven mitts to rub your partner’s penis until it is full erect. 

Step three: Remove the hot water bottle from your pussy (or bussy) and place your partner’s penis inside. Be careful, it’s hot! 

Whack-a-Mole

Step one: Either in the forest or at a pet store, find a mole the approximate size of your pussy (or bussy). 

Step two: Go home and place the mole inside your pussy (or bussy). Make sure it doesn’t bite you! 

Step three: Grab hold of your partner’s penis and use it to whack the mole on the head every time it tries to escape your pussy (or bussy). See if you can get a score of ten before the clock runs out! 

Makin’ Butter

Step one: Fill your pussy (or bussy) with heavy cream, preferably straight from the cow.  

Step two: Use your partner’s penis as a churn-staff to churn that cream in your pussy (or bussy) into thick, delicious butter.  

Step three: Lightly sprinkle with salt, and enjoy!