Each and every one of us, every *a*, every **k*, every ***n**, every ******x*** (or some combination thereof), has heard it in one form or another: “Think of the children!”
Just think about their extreme innocence and whatnot; their empty expressions, their charming lack of socialization, their curious natures. We all know that it’s quite a dangerous thing to be a child, and a grave responsibility to look over one, to be the steward of its development. Children,being so soft and malleable, could be made to think or do anything. You can even poke their brains before their skulls have closed up if they’re very little. This is why it’s vital that we always think of the children, always keep them in mind.
It would be an unmitigated tragedy if an impressionable infant were to see something queer. For example, some people holding hands, or looking a certain way, or being like that could give a child certain ideas. What if this hypothetical babe were to begin to think, “What if I did that, or looked that way, or was that?” These sorts of thoughts are totally alien to the mind of a child, in which nothing has been inscribed except the vision of the Nuclear Family as designed by God and Henry Ford. This image was put there, of course, by Nature. Yes, with a capital N!
Furthermore, some things are just inappropriate for children to know about. There is a great divide, which is also totally Natural, between adult subjects and childish subjects. At some point, a child becomes an adult and can be exposed to certain things. Nobody knows when this moment arrives, but it is probably instant and caused by quantum physics. Nonetheless, violence, sex, most aspects of the economy, death, strong language, *does the pretending to take a swig of my whiskey bottle gesture*, and probably theatre are safely in the camp of the adult. But most importantly, all queerness, as a subheading under sex. It’s unclear what will happen to the child once exposed to adult subject matter. Most psychologists think they will become murderers or delinquents or become “rowdy.” In a worst-case scenario, they might “develop a gender” or “go gay.” At this point, the child’s life is basically over. That little picture of the family with the kids and the simple marriage goes up in smoke. It’s really unacceptable, unless your parents are woke or something—and then it’s just complicated.
Though the child, lovely as it is, does a great disservice to queer people. I think actual children get off much worse. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but kids are actually very smart. Sure, they have their bad moments (don’t we all?) but you must give them credit where it’s due. Most children, if given the right support and raised in a healthy environment, prove not to be the gormless blank slate the figure of the child makes them out to be.
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