Cracking the case: an investigative report
Hello Members of Strand Publications,
Don’t get us wrong, Jack O. Denton is a stellar name. Truly one of the greats in baby name history. But with every baby and new baby name comes literally dozens of missed opportunities. Here is more than one dozen of them:
Jack O’Lantern
Jack Oligarchy Denton
Jack Onomatopoeia Denton
Jack Olive Gardenton
Jack Oh, the Places You’ll Go! Denton
Jack Oohlala! Denton
Jack Organic, Fair Trade™ and locally grown Denton
Jack O Captain! My Captain! Denton
J. Orthodontic Dental
Jack Orange-you-glad-I-didn’t-say Denton?
Jack Oops! I did it a Denton
Jack onesearch.library.utoronto.ca Denton
Jack Oldmacdonaldhadafarm e i e i O Denton
Jack Orientalism-by-Edward Said-the-foundational-text-of-postcolonial-theory Denton
Jack OSAP (rip) Denton
Jack On My Way! Denton
The Strand would like to formally request that the O’Dentons submit Jack’s original, official birth certificate via mail, addressed to Strand Editors at 150 Charles Street West, Room 153, Toronto, Ontario, Canada, M5S 1K9.
If you have any information about Jack One-Earring Denton’s middle initial, please contact The Strand at www.JackOogieOogieOogieOyOyOyYayyyyyyVicDenton.ca or through our new News Tip-line at thestrand.ca/tips.
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