Topfive places to grow corn on Victoria College campus

Hey incoming farmer Vickies, welcome to Victoria College. I am so excited to have you join us! I am Farmer Joe: I’m sort of Victoria College’s resident farming expert. I actually hoped to enroll in Agricultural Sciences at UofT so that I could hone my craft and go back to the family farm and (literally) grow an empire. Tragedy struck when I accidentally enrolled in Anthropology. To quench my thirst for farming and to hold true to my roots in grain farming, I’ve started to farm on the Victoria College campus! For those incoming farmers to Victoria College, life is tough. There aren’t many of us—trust me, I’ve found only five other people on Farmers Only within a 10km radius of downtown Toronto. The land in downtown Toronto is not ideal either; it’s really hard to grow anything of real substance down here! Here is where I come in: to orient you to campus and make your life as a farmer easier, here is my list of the top five best places on campus to grow corn, my favourite crop!

1. Victoria College Quad

This is a no-brainer. Good sunlight and quality soil make it an optimal growing spot for corn. The amount of space will allow you to grow enough ears of corn to hear Grammy’s snoring all the way back in Kitchener! Get planting in early April so that you can come back just in time in late August to see the entire quad in its full glory—a farmer’s delight!

2. Margaret Addison Parking Lot

Ok, this spot will take some more work. You’re gonna have to remove all the pavers, which has proven difficult because the Victoria College maintenance staff have warned me about not doing it in the past. Apparently it’s hard to park cars and service vehicles in a corn field. You’re going to have to fight them off just like the coyotes back at home, but it will be worth it!

3. Second Floor of EJ Pratt Library, East Side Windows

I’ve recently experimented with a species of winter corn, but it still needs to be kept somewhere warm. EJ Pratt Library is relatively cozy in the winter and the east side on the second floor gets great sunlight through the windows. Pop a few planters onto the desks and watch your corn grow!

4. The Cat’s Eye

Looking to hide from the Victoria College staff that are continuously chasing you out of the quad while planting? Want squirrels to stop digging up your seeds? The Cat’s Eye offers you a safe place to plant corn. Although there isn’t any sunlight, the stage lights offer a good replacement.

5. Your own room!

Look, between you and me, growing agricultural-grade corn isn’t the most highly regarded activity. If you’re really missing the tastes, smells, and traditions of home and the Victoria College staff have chased you out of every other location listed above (like me), you can attempt to grow corn in your own room. I’ve heard lots of discussion about growing plants for your own personal use. As long as you keep to four plants for personal use, you should be able to get away with it. Good luck!

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