This could be you!
Below is a diary entry found at the entrance of Robarts Library, dated October 3, 2022. This classified document is part of a conservation project by the University of Toronto Archives. Its author is unknown.
University of Toronto. Robarts Library. 8:32 PM
I’m disappointed to inform you that I have, yet again, stumbled my way into an unfortunate situation. I got caught up in September: the beautiful month of no assignments, no deadlines, and the illusion of freedom! Little did I know that deceptive September turns into cruel October: two papers due tomorrow, multiple discussion posts for a book I haven’t read, and a draft for the Strand I have not yet started. Holding my T-Card, I tearfully entered Robarts, bracing for the fate I was forced to face by my own hand.
10:07 PM
With 0% of my work finished and an empty Starbucks cup in hand, I have now relocated to the Robarts Commons. The voices of others have begun to ricochet off the walls, echoing through my mind, which is seemingly hollow of intelligence or motivation. I started to see apparitions of Quercus notifications flickering on the walls, and my eyes focused on one:
-127/60. This is the worst essay I have ever read in the entirety of my academic career. I will be contacting the admissions office in order to remove you as a student. In fact, I will be contacting the campus police to remove you from the school premises, because you should not be permitted to touch the grounds of the University of Toronto. Furthermore, I will be contacting the authorities to have you jailed for the crime of subjecting others to read such abhorrent writing.
My fingers started to shake, inadvertently hitting the keyboard and typing nonsense onto my Google Doc that only had my name, UTORid, course code, and my professor’s name half written on it. I forced myself to focus on the (minimal) words on the screen.
12:43 AM
If you are reading this, I may already have turned. I was diligently attempting to string some semblance of sense into my English paper, yet accidentally fell asleep. After I woke up, I looked up at my computer screen and saw a zombie staring back at me. I knew what I had to do. I quickly gathered my belongings and began to flee from the horrid-looking creature. Its eyes were bloodshot and had large bags below them, and its fatigued expression revealed to me that it was part of the undead. I am currently hiding out in the stacks, though I suspect that those far less versed in the art of survival (not all are proficient in the skill of Minecraft) have already begun to become infected. I fear for the safety of my fellow students, yet I must make sure that my family and I (me and my KPop photocard) make it out of here alive.
2:01 AM
I have left the truly evil and despicable building known as Robarts Library. Exhilarated, I turned back to the building to see if any zombies had exited the premises. Why had I done so! I felt a chill down my spine and I knew something horrible was going to happen. I was Orpheus and Robarts was the Underworld. The evil brutalist peacock turned its eyes toward me. I am bracing for what happens next. I hope I surv—