Remembering what Stranded has lost in the past year
Note: I’ve only been the Stranded editor since September, so this article only covers September to December. If you died in between January and August 2018, I apologize.
Note: Please listen to “You Raise Me Up” by Josh Groban while you read this article.
Becky Gu, ?-2018
Most well known for her famous article “It’s COCKtober you sluts,” Becky Gu has not been heard from since October 2018. She is presumed dead. In lieu of flowers, Becky’s family requests that you please send her message on to the 12 spookiest sluts you know.
The Strand itself
The Strand was totally owned by The Boundary this past November (pictured below). The diss was so vicious that The Strand was totally destroyed and everyone just died.
The Boundary
Sadly, without copies of The Strand to hide their “newspaper” in, The Boundary went out of business shortly after they destroyed The Strand. Shame.
Dr. Friedrich and Dr. Hanz
Dr. Friedrich and Dr. Hanz were world-famous doctors of ASMR, best known for their famous routine “Robbing a Store That Only Sells Jello.” They were also renowned for their charity work providing free ASMR training for orphans in developing nations. Both of them died this October in a terrible pickle-swallowing accident.
Ainsley and Sabrina’s friendship
The Strand Editors-in-Chief, Ainsley and Sabrina, used to be best friends. They did activities together, such as go to the movies. They even shared socks. But now they hate each other and call each other mean names and spit at each other during meetings. It’s very unpleasant.
