Arriving in 45 minutes

The only proper way to commute is with your earbuds playing a great audiobook or a playlist that places you as the protagonist in a coming of age movie. When you step onto the train, you’ll hopefully find a comfortable seat by the window and look out at the scenery. You’ll be arriving at your destination in 45 minutes. 

Contrary to popular belief, commuting is not necessarily a painful experience. While the time commitment and tiresome process of commuting may be mildly inconvenient, my commute from Mississauga to Victoria College via bus and train are the best two hours of my day. Even with the occasional strange or discomforting encounter, I cherish my commute time. While I’ve been told by friends who hate their commute that this is a controversial opinion, allow  me a chance to explain. 

September rolls around and another year of pushing myself past my limits begins: aiming for the stars, trying to land gracefully, and having to scrape myself off the ground when I fall. School has always been my favourite place—I love learning, and it’s where I feel most comfortable in my skin. That being said, I sometimes feel that the pressures associated with success in university (and in turn, success in life) are ruining my relationship with school. I’ve consistently been dubbed an “overachiever.” I understand how that can be perceived as a compliment, but labels cause harm no matter their intention; with the pressure of living up to perfection, school can be exhausting. To get into university, I joined over ten clubs in high school, held a high GPA, and slowly burned out without understanding why I was suddenly so frustrated all the time. While I have reflected on the experience and now understand  why I felt the way I did, I unthinkingly set myself up to repeat my high school mistakes in university. 

I’m learning every day that there is no need to spread yourself so thin that you can’t recognize yourself. While hard work is important, the best way to work hard is to rest up and do things because you love them, not because you think they’ll get you to point B sooner . For the people who go the extra mile, for the students who feel the constant need to be perfect in school and in life, going to campus this year will be draining. The cherry on top was the pandemic, which made my social skills regress to the point of awkwardness around my closest friends. It’s going to be hard attending  classes and participating in person, trying to make friends again, and keeping up with my existing friends without my social battery completely draining every day. I know I’ll end up taking on more than I can handle again, and, knowing this, I can’t wait to commute once more. 

I’ve been a commuter all my life, and let me say: it is severely underrated. I used to have friends in high school who would look down on commuting due to “lack of freedom” or “grimy public transport.” I understand their criticism; commuting can be time consuming, and living out of residence can definitely curtail  socializing on campus. This past year, I made friends that live on campus and I do sometimes wish I could spend more time with them outside of Zoom. I recognize these problems, but I also know that commuting is part of my identity as a student. There are many organizations available for those who commute, and friends that are okay with planning occasional get-togethers to work with my schedule. It is lonely at times, but I would still argue that commuting is a blessing. Anyone who says differently has yet to discover the full potential of commuting. 

I’m on the bus for 20 minutes, followed by a 45 minute train ride. Though this may seem like a waste of time, I can do so much in that hour. More importantly, I’m alone for that hour. As university students, we should remember that it’s okay—even beneficial—to have time alone. I look forward to the end of a long day of socializing and studying, where I have a world of experiences at my fingertips. I do not feel pressure to be someone I am not, and so I remove  my metaphorical mask for the day and head home. (That said, please continue to wear your physical masks on any commute you may be participating in!)

From the book or audiobook of the week to amazing Spotify playlists, entertainment is endless. Even on the worst days, where I feel like I’m falling and might never get up, I pull up my most depressing playlist and pretend that I’m in a sad movie. I’ve searched for online courses and started attending pre-downloaded sign language classes. But by far, the most interesting aspect of my commutes are my fellow commuters. What a powerful realization it is that all the people around us have unique lives and experiences. The commute home breeds both a deep hatred and an overwhelming sense of empathy for humankind. Perhaps both these feelings are necessary to stay sane as a human. People-watching is an unabashed practice in many parts of the world, so don’t be shy to occasionally sneak a glance at your fellow commuters and ponder what kind of lives they may lead. 

My beloved commute always allows me a space to grow with myself. There will be times where I forget your earbuds, don’t charge my device, or it’s too packed to even bother pulling any distractions out. I already know it’ll be a bad day if I can’t disconnect while I’m going to school, so I’ve begun the practice of trying to be uncomfortable with myself as the stations tick by. I think about the obstacles I’m facing in my daily life. The discomfort comes when all the thoughts I’ve been busily avoiding are suddenly at the forefront of my mind when I have no distraction. It’s easy to assume that by disconnecting on the commute, I’m avoiding my very real problems. My avoidance is true, but sometimes the commute is the only place where you have no responsibilities and can just be. 

Finally, as we return to a semi-regular commute to and from school, I urge readers to remember that no commute is complete without the romanticization of life. The space of a commute is unique for many reasons, but primarily it creates a bubble of time accessible only to other commuters. In that period of getting to school, you can see someone and imagine a whole life as friends or lovers—and yet you’ll remain perfect strangers. In my opinion, the best practice is making up stories for yourself as you commute. You’re not just a student taking the subway; you’re a quiet and mysteriously enduring commuter, riding the train with a beautiful mind and intriguing eyes. If your commute plotlines don’t sound like something out of Twilight or The Notebook, you’re not doing it right.

While I think being alone can be beneficial, I also know that so many people surround us at all times. We may spend hours of our lives commuting and if all we do is complain about the commute, we lose out on amazing possibilities . I used to take the same 7:45 am bus to my high school, and eventually I made friends with random people who were taking this bus on their way to wherever. We never asked where the other was going; we’d just wave and wish each other a good day. I’ve had my fair share of “telling my life to a stranger” experiences as I head downtown. Of course, I don’t go out of my way to talk to strangers, but some people exude a positive energy and if I feel comfortable to do so, I’ll reach out. Commuting can be used to take a risk and put yourself out there, to meet someone you may otherwise not have. Personally, I’ve noticed that when I ignore the opportunity to meet new people, I end up a bit miserable. 

Sometimes you’ll make commuter friends, or else you’ll have a great story, like the time I decided to bring home an extra large pizza during rush hour and had three separate occasions where kids asked if they could have a slice. Sometimes you just have to spice up your life.

With the potential for in-person classes this year, I relish knowing I’ll not only be able to see my friends on campus, but that my identity as a commuter student will be restored. The collective  experience of complaining about the commute while simultaneously loving the time alone is a uniting rite of passage among student commuters. Should you find yourself commuting, use the time to grow, to be alone with yourself for a while. I’m going to use my commute as a restorative time, to prepare myself for the day ahead or wind down from a long one. I’ll be open to strange and exciting experiences on the commute. And hopefully I’ll see you there! Look for the girl who is sitting in the second subway car and  looking outside like she has a big, wide world waiting for her.