Author: Rebecca Gao

The dos and don’ts of first year

A visual guide   First year is a hectic time for everyone. Moving to a new city, meeting tons of new people, and adjusting to a new academic environment can be overwhelming. As someone who did “aight” for herself in first year, it’s time for me to impart my very, very finite wisdom on people who are probably only a few months younger. Here’s a short visual guide to help you navigate your first year. Good luck! 1. DO try new foods! University is a time for experimentation. Leave the white bread of your small town behind. 2. DO work in groups with new friends! This is a great way to connect with your classmates while also getting the most out of your education. Find your support networks and stick with ‘em! 3. DON’T try to make friends during Frosh Week by sniffing them. Sure, your dog can do it and sure, it’s super cute when he does, but no one is going to hang if all you wanna do is smell their sweaty Frosh Week armpits. 4. DO experiment with your look! It’s a new year, city, school, etc. Get the perm you’ve always wanted, shave your head if you wanna! It’s only questionable if you question it. 5. DON’T date someone who lives on your floor because you WILL break up and then your own home will stop being safe. Trust...

Read More

Sleeping with wet hair causes lifelong migraines

The latest findings from the International Mothers Conference will shock you  Mother’s Day isn’t for another couple of months, but moms worldwide were busy this past weekend as they congregated in Toronto for the annual International Mothers Conference (ICM). The weekend was packed full of presentations and keynote speakers, with one notable finding confirming that that wet hair does cause lifelong migraines.   “After living in the dark for generations, we can finally rest easy knowing that your inexplicable headache is a result of sleeping with wet hair, Bradley,” Susan Wong, a local mother, said while simultaneously addressing a panel of scientist mommies and scolding her idiot son.   This announcement comes after years of agonizing research by mothers worldwide, including the measurement of hair-to-moisture ratios, much to the chagrin of the children of the world.   Other new findings announced at the ICM include the discovery of cold water’s adverse effects on your health. The report doesn’t specify what health-harming effects cold water has, but the mothers have assured us that it’s very much true and that we should just be drinking warm water to settle our stomachs, goddamnit.   This revolutionary discovery came as a shock to many, and caused ripples of dissent to arise within the scientific community. Dr. Thomas Smith, a local neurologist, immediately told the mothers that their form of science was “patchy” at best and “devastatingly irresponsible” at worst. We here at The Strand disagree and are inclined to believe...

Read More
  • 1
  • 2