A eulogy to Vine

The lord giveth, and the lord taketh away. There is no other way to say this: Vine is dead.

What the hell are we supposed to do now? Watch America’s Funniest Home Videos clips on YouTube? Tom Bergeron is a low-rent Tim Allen, and we all know what that man did. I don’t want that around my kids—Vine was the family-friendly platform that we all needed.

In the spirit of the 6-second video platform that really should not have worked but did, this introduction will be brief. The Strand is a student newspaper dedicated to high-stakes, Woodward-and-Bernstein muckraking journalism. But, we at The Strand know that sometimes, all we need is a video of someone obliterating a Krispy Kreme sign. So, here are a bunch of hilarious Vines, in no apparent order.

Content note: There is swearing, drugs, and violence in some of these Vines.

1. “Okay” guy

2. Peanut butter baby

3. Why you always lyin’?

4. Dick Cheney made money off the Iraq War

5. Mike Huckabee’s take on Benghazi

6. Calculator selfie

7. Goat says Hi

8. Seduction mom

9. Jesus Christ, that’s Jason Bourne

10. Lawnmower Mariah Carey

11. Wake me up

12. 69 mph

13. Literally just an AFV video

14. #coolstorewarmhearts

15. I, too, am this scared of Minions

16. Expose him

17. “Lizzie McGuire”

18. A requisite Young Metro Vine

19. Kid gets catapulted

20. “Is that allowed?”

21. Lebron James

22. Take me to the limit

23. A potato flew around

24. Vapers of New York

25. Deke

26. Moms + Future

27. Kid in a locker

28. Diesel jeans

29. This kid supports his own brand.

30. “Hi, Welcome to Chili’s”

31. Look at this ‘graph

32. You gotta bae…

33. What a feeling

Did we miss a Vine? Post it in the comments! Or don’t! Vine is dead, anyways—#RIPVine

Special thanks to Charlie Bossy, Gabriel Zoltan-Johan, Neil MacIsaac, Blaire Golledge, and @bobby for the great Vine content while it lasted.